The vertical grounding. Mind, Body, Soul. Very separate entities with specific purposes. The daily grounding and quiet reminders of where I've come from and who I was created to be. This is my daily morning Jesus/coffee time.
Stabilizer: the thing you can't NOT do. Running, physical exercise, dance, moving my body, doing HARD HARD stuff. It's a portal. A portal to my Creator and a way that I access a limitless cauldron of will, determination and stick-to-it-ness. A name for the stabilizer would help. My soul knows but in order for my physical body to recognize, I need a visual and a name. I'm inspired to study about Chief Joseph of the Nez Perce trip from the Wallowa Valley (OR). Chief Joseph's given native names was Hin-mah-too-yah-lat-kekt which means Thunder rolling down mountain. He was a leader, a peace seeker and someone who did not give up easily. He was described as having an iron will. I'm working on the name for my stabilizer and a picture too. The healing power of electricity which is part of what creates thunder. A lightening bolt may represent the vertical grounding part 1). I can LEAN into this because it's stronger and bigger than myself. It is not intimidated by my insatiable needs...the ones that reach deeper than what is ever seen by others, the needs that are known in the deep. I don't rely on it to do work that I need to do, I lean on it while I do the work.
Mindset. The mindset is the path. The path of where I'm headed and who I am going to be. The plain, simple, old-school me. The me that my soul and spirit remember but have been given reasons to not BE. The me that loves pure beauty that only nature can offer. The me that hates AC and microwaves. The part of me that wants to do it the hard way, wants the rugged, tough and tired path. It's worth it. The peace that comes from this mindset and path of life, is insurmountable.
How does this manifest into a finish at IMTUF. I'm not exactly sure yet. Maybe it doesn't matter, but I have a deep seeded feeling that it's the deal breaker or rather the deal sealer. Prior to my BigHorn 100 finish in 2012, I knew I would finish. I was solid in that no matter how horrible I felt, there was just nothing short of a fracture in my femur that would stop me. I have tried to figure out what got my mind in that place and get there again. Somehow, it's resurrected...that mind set. Like a phoenix. I'm excited. I'm ready to explode with desire and drive.
Three weeks from tonight I will be running all night.....the "thing" that sets 100 milers apart from all other ultras. The over night component. I will run my race. I will focus on what I need and not where I am in comparison to others. I may come in DFL but it matters not. What matters to my spirit is that I finish. The end. I will conjure my iron will that hasn't quit on my life and is just getting started. The call of the mountains is so strong in me. The mountains offer limitless opportunities for HARD...the portal.